10 Acts Of Courtesy That Count In A Healthy Relationship
A healthy relationship does not just happen; someone will have to make it happen. In building a healthy relationship everything put into it has to be intentional, you should intentionally love, pray, kiss, hug, and even talk in the relationship. Don’t have the mentality of if my partner loves me, he or she will take my wrongs. Yeah, to some extent, your partner has to love you flawlessly regardless of your flaws. But on your part consciously do all the needful to grow the relationship, if your flaws will ruin the relationship; outgrow them till you are able to do away with them.
To have a healthy relationship, the following 10 acts of courtesy really count:
- Say I Love You: This is very important that I have to start with it. Couples of time I have heard people saying something like saying “I love you’ does not really matter in a relationship. Hey! Come off it! Saying “I love you” is as important as the relationship itself. If you do not always remind your partner you do, how do you expect him or her to know? Read your mind? So impossible, sorry dear, you just have to always profess your love to your partner, so he or she can assured of the fact that you still love and care. Constantly saying that to your partner put him or her in remembrance of the fact that someone still loves and such help take doubts away. Do not get to the point that you will be too familiar with the words ‘I love you” and it do not really count to you because the words really count in a healthy relationship.
- Say I Am Sorry When Needed: Learn to apologize to your partner with the simple word “I am sorry”. Don’t be like my partner/spouse loves me so much that even if I don’t say sorry, I am forgiven. Congratulations, but you still need to say it even when your partner forgives easily and quickly. Do not use your partner goodness to hurt him/her. Some relationships have become history just because one or both partners found it difficult to say sorry. Saying “I am sorry” when needed is very important in a healthy relationship. The time you are wrong is not the time to display your ego or show muscles, just say sorry and let the matter die.
- Explain, Don’t Nag: Many people do not know how to have a simple conversation without nagging, even in their relationships, they demonstrate the same attitude. No, it is very wrong. I mean nagging is very wrong, avoid it at all cause. I remember finding myself in a conversation with someone which almost wanted to turn me to a nag; I immediately said to myself, no, I am not a nag. I quitted the conversation. In your relationship nothing is worth nagging for, if talking it out clearly cannot solve it, neither will nag help. Try as much as possible to always explain yourself without shouting or nagging, be as calm as possible. When you need to be very firm, be firm, being firm is not synonymous to nagging.
- Be Attentive: Yeah, here we come. So many people have a very low attention span; they find it hard to listen even in their relationship. To maintain a healthy relationship you need a good attentive skill. Learn to listen, reply and give body gestures when needed. I do ask people what do you think relationship is all about. Having sex all day, hugging, praying all day? The simple answer to this is that relationship is communication first before every other. Don’t be manipulated with I am not really a talking person, if you need a healthy relationship; you have to listen and talk. Therefore, learn to listen attentively to your partner, let your partner notice that you pay attention to everything about him or her
- Say Thank You: This is a simple courtesy you should inculcate. When your partner does even the little thing for you say thank you. Don’t make it seems as if your partner owes you, so you don’t have to appreciate what he or she does. Show your partner that you are grateful by appreciation. The truth is that your partner does not owe you anything not even money, it is love that makes him or her always want to give to you, so appreciate the love by saying thank you.
- Always Appreciate Your Partner’s Look: Your partner takes out time to dress up and most time he or she has you in mind when dressing up. Don’t ignore this, appreciate and give complementary. It may be by simply saying, you look good, you’re beautiful, you look great etc. Just make sure you let your partner know that you are feeling or you notice the look.
- Phone Call Over Chats: In a healthy relationship phone call is important than texting or chatting. Let your partner know he or she mean a lot to you by taking time out to call and check up than just chatting. Phone call should be done at least once a day. There should be a very genuine and tangible reason why you won’t talk to your partner on phone daily.
- Respect Your Partner’s Values: Always respect your partner’s values, don’t disdain his or her values like they don’t make sense. For instance, if your partner’s value is excellence and this makes him or her to always want to attain perfection in all things. Don’t insult him or her for it, appreciate it and help him.
- Look Into Your Partner’s Eyes During Conversations: If you don’t know how to do this learn it. It shows your partner that you are into the conversation and your full attention is there. It makes your partner to be aware of the fact that he or she always has your attention.
- Give Gifts: Love is not just in words, show your love by giving gifts to your partner. It may be on his or her special days and even on normal days give gifts to your partner. To my darling ladies, don’t abandon giving to the men, give to them too. That your fiancé that gives you a lot also likes gifts. In a healthy relationship both partners have the mentality of giving more and taking less.