9 Psychological Effects Of Being In A Long Distance Relationship
1) FEAR OF MISSING OUT (FOMO):
It is defined in the Oxford Dictionary as “Anxiety that an exciting or interesting event may currently be happening elsewhere, often aroused by posts seen on social media.” It is a real thing. We’ve all felt it, the fear of missing out sucks. It is amplified when you feel like you are missing out on the large chunks of their life. It becomes more saddening as the days pass by and you start missing out on the smaller instances. too. You begin to feel like you don’t really know the person and they are changing. It starts affecting you and your relationship. It has become so prevalent that some mental health professionals have termed it an epidemic among young adults. Also, a pervasive mental health syndrome for all ages. To get out of FOMO, the best thing would be to face it and fight it. Some steps that can be taken include admit your problem and practice mindfulness.
2) POSSESSIVENESS or INSECURITY:
It is a born feeling to know what the other partner is doing and where they are. This feeling of possessiveness or insecurity can be really difficult to overcome. You sometimes start panicking when the partner doesn’t reply back within a few minutes. Distance makes trusting difficult and aids towards possessiveness. The reality is probably very different, of course. But feeling the same for a long time may affect the health of yourselves and your relationship. The important thing to think is that whether you have anything to be insecure about? Are any of these things or people more important to your partner than you are? The answer is usually no. Therefore, always remember that your partner has chosen to be with you and there will be a hundred reasons for that. Try to be confident about all the things that make you special.
It is an extreme case of possessiveness or insecurity. It signals that you do care about the partner but too much of jealousy creates a negative impact on the relationship. Also, being continually jealous and having an argument on the same may possibly ruin a perfectly good relationship. Just by letting your mind be filled with jealousy and suspicion can be disturbing. In this, you just give yourself some unnecessary worries. It is likely to lead towards arguments with your partner, who might feel sad and hurt that you don’t trust them. Well, you should learn this thing that if your partner is really planning to cheat on you, there is not much you can do about it. Also, worrying about the same beforehand will do more harm than good. That means that you have nothing to lose by trusting your partner and your relationship might go smooth.
For those who are in a LDR, stress seems to be a part of a gig. Just listening to the word makes your heart beat a little faster. Being apart from the person whom you want to be the most with is very stressful. And when you and your partner are stressed, misunderstandings and conflicts can arise very easily. You get annoyed easily and start arguing over very silly things more frequently than before. Just try to find out the biggest source of pressure or stress when you are struggling in a relationship with your partner. Try to work over those and things like having patience, motivation, learning yoga can be a way to achieve more out of the situation of stress.
Anxiety is no easy ride when you have to live with it especially due to a long distance relationship. It is not good for you as well as for the people who are closest to you be it your partner or your friends and family. You will have a lot going on in your mind in this state. Most of those thoughts will be comprised of hypothetical situations, which may or may not be realistic but may cross your mind anyway. You are constantly at the edge thinking what is going to happen next. You may feel unsettled as you are not really sure what’s next. The distance makes it so much harder than you get stuck in a loop of what-ifs and you may not be able to stop it. If your partner is having anxiety than that is a whole new story where you should be prepared to answer a lot of questions. Be prepare for comforting your partner. Sometimes there can be moments of silence whereas sometimes there can be anxiety attacks taking place. Things, like listening to music, maintaining a journal, taking deep breaths and visualizing a safe space for yourself can really help you to get out of the situation. The more anxious you are, the harder it’ll be to maintain a happy relationship.
It is usual to feel alone and lonely when you are in a distance from your significant other. These emotions of missing your partner every single day are very normal. Sometimes it is just the emptiness that you may feel and sometimes it is a loss of contact with the partner. This starts making you wonder whether you are close to your partner or not? You know that you are not alone and that your partner is there to back you up. But you feel, that connection is lost when you were together. Just hold on and fight with your feelings, it is just a matter of a particular thought or a day and it will probably go away. Things, like planning the future together, keeping alive the emotional and physical intimacy, having a communication schedule, can bring you far away from the point where you will feel lonely.
Research suggests that one of the factors which lead to the termination of Long Distance Relationship is negativity. No relationship can thrive from the steady stream of negativity flowing into it. Negativity arises readily if you feel any of the above-mentioned characteristics. It is easy to get lost in the negative aspect of a long distance relationship. Like feeling alone all the time, missing each other, dealing with jealousy and much more. The effects of these negative aspects are very drastic. Even a small amount of negative brain activity can weaken your immune system badly, making you more prone to illness. It can affect your intelligence as well as the ability to think. It may go unnoticed sometimes until something drastic happens. Things, like practicing kindness, setting your limits, focusing on your vision, surrounding yourself with more positive people can help you experience positivity.
LDR can be one of the toughest journeys for a couple to experience. Depression can be one of the underlying emotion for most of the people in LDR. It darkens your thoughts and feelings, can last for weeks or months and can come and go. When you are depressed for long, you are dragging your partner and others as well into it and your partner also suffers from it. It just leaves your significant other with a feeling of helplessness and confusion. To fight with the same, you need to be aware of emotions. Things, like talking to each other or family or friends about it, assuring your partner, eating healthy, going for meditation, regularly exercising, can be done to enrich your life. If you still feel stuck into it for long, you may think of consulting a psychologist.
It needs to be taken care of at a very initial level in LDR so that the issues leading to fear can be resolved right there. Don’t curb it and then burst out one day when it has been transformed into some serious issues. It can lead to other psychological symptoms like stress, anxiety, depression etc. Insecurity and jealousy drive the fears like Fear Of Missing Out(FOMO), cheating, not being able to see or talk to them on a regular basis, the partner not having time and asking for space, future stability etc. Things, like writing down your fears and from where is it coming, avoiding excessive interference, establishing parameters, clarifying trust issues can avoid the fears and in turn its consequences.