There is a rise in rape cases in this period, especially during the lockdown where people were put on compulsory sit at home. Several rape allegations have been made by women worldwide. Nigeria as a case study has recorded more than 717 rape cases. Rape is a grievous offence, it should not be condoned in any society. If rape does not kill the victim, it may leave her in a traumatic situation forever. Most countries provide a grievous punishment for anyone found guilty of rape and Nigeria is not exempted. Punishment for rape is contained in the Criminal Code, Penal Code and Criminal Law of every state in Nigeria.
Despite the gravity of this offence, some ladies do not understand that it is not an offence to falsely accuse anyone to have committed. As terrible as it can be for any woman or girl to be raped is that terrible for any man to be falsely accused of rape. Some women even prank or joke with that they were raped when they were not. Rape is not funny, do not joke, prank or punish any man with it.
Should we say they do not understand what rape is? According to the Criminal Law of Lagos State 2015 section 260(1) any man who has unlawful sexual intercourse with a woman or girl, without her consent, is guilty of the offence of rape and liable to imprisonment for life. From this section, it can be deduced that rape is unlawful sexual intercourse with a woman or girl without her consent. Note that a girl under the law of rape is a female under the age of 18, the law deemed that a girl under the age of 18 cannot consent to any sexual intercourse, so if anyone has sexual intercourse with a girl under 18 even if he said she consented, it will amount to rape. However, for a woman, any female of the age 18 and above, if a man unlawfully has sexual intercourse with her without her consent, it would amount to rape. We have understood what rape is, now let’s understand what rape is not. For easy learning I will be giving just 5 acts that should not be considered as rape:
- He abandoned me after sex: after some ladies are abandoned, they feel used and think that they were raped. If a guy should abandon you after having a consented sexual intercourse with you, he has not raped you, he might have broken up with you but not be said to have raped you. So as a lady try to get the concept of rape beyond just your emotion.
- I didn’t say yes to my husband: I have seen many women on social media claiming their husbands raped them because they did consent to it or when they were sleeping or he beat them before having sex with them. Oh, so sorry if their husbands actually did all that but the law is that it is impossible for the husband to rape the wife.Section 260(3) of the criminal law of Lagos State (2015) states that:
Sexual intercourse between a man and a woman who are married is not unlawful.
This implies that any sexual intercourse between a married man and his wife is legal and cannot amount to rape. Instead of wailing that your husband rapes you, you can claim you were assaulted or charge your husband of domestic violence. You can also start protesting, advocating and petitioning for marital rape in Nigeria.
- I felt raped: It is astonishing how some ladies claim that after the sexual intercourse they felt raped. Hey, come off it! Rape has nothing to do with what you are feeling. Don’t say because you feel he did not handle you right during or after sex he has raped you. Raped is beyond your feeling. Get it right now, you were not raped, you were only mishandled, if that is an offence, congratulation and if not move on. But the heartbreaking thing is that that is not an offence in law, just take it as a mistake on your part, learn from it, ensure it does not repeat itself and move on.
- You are just a side chick: There is nothing more painful to a lady than after you have allowed a guy to sleep with you just because you thought you are the main babe, he later said oh, sorry; you are just my side chick. Regardless of the pain and sorrow, dear, it was not a rape, you consented to it. It is just unfortunate that the guy is unfaithful.
- Injury during sex: just because you had tears, sore or was dry during sex did not mean that you were raped. It may occur at times that during sex you incur an injury, this does not imply rape. Once you consent to sexual intercourse and do not at any time withdraw consent, there is no rape.